Challenging Your Negative Mindsets
Are you a natural pessimist? If your answer is yes, you more than likely possess the unique power to spot what could go wrong in any situation.
More than likely, someone in your life at one point or another tried to get you to see the positive side of something, but you found this difficult. They may have encouraged you to practice affirmations, embrace positivity, or even establish a mantra—but you found it virtually impossible to adopt such practices.
It’s natural to experience feelings of worry, fear, anxiety, and disappointment. Unfortunately, if you allow yourself to remain in such emotions, it can create devastating mental and emotional effects to yourself and others around you.
Don’t beat yourself up so much. There is a danger in having a constant negative mindset. Acknowledging this does not mean that you should indulge in a fantasy world all day every day. That will also have a negative effect on you. In fact, that may prove equally damaging to your overall mental wellness. The solution is that you must establish a healthy balance in your life that permits you to navigate past the dangers of world in the best possible fashion.
Tips for Changing Your Negative Mindset
How can you possibly change your negative mindset? It seems everyone has an opinion on this particular topic. But which actions are really most effective?
Amy Morin, author of the book 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do recommends that you change your mindset by improving your mental strength. In a recent Inc article, Morin suggests that to change your mindset, you must first recognize your triggers, or BLUE thoughts, that contribute to these episodes.
BLUE thoughts include the following:
Blaming Myself
Self-blame plays a significant role in BLUE thoughts. This is the belief that everything wrong that is happening is all your fault. This way of thinking about one’s self can lead to mental problems, including depression.
Looking for Bad News
Do you ever find yourself anticipating the bad news coming your way in one form or another? You might believe this way of thinking is you being a realist. But in actuality, snooping around for bad things that may happen is not the healthiest way of spending your mental energy.
Unhappy Guessing
Do you find yourself consistently predicting or foreshadowing doom and gloom—even though it is not necessarily likely it will happen? You might tell yourself that you are just preparing yourself for the worst, but actually it is far better to just deal with the emotional ramifications of bad events when they happen.
Exaggeratedly Negative
When you exaggerate the negative in a situation, you make the negatives seem to outweigh the positives more than they actually do. Have you ever had a job that you felt was horrible on every level? You might have said, “Nothing about this job is good.
My boss is intimidating, my co-workers are sneaky, and my customers are all evil.” But someone else might love that same job. The problem is that you made everything about that particular situation appear negative.
Trade the BLUE Thoughts for Reality
Morin further states that if you want to rid yourself of these BLUE thoughts, you have to become a realist. You must recognize not only the negative facets of an event but also the positive as well.
Ultimately, whenever you identify the negative aspects of a situation, your goal should be to determine a positive and genuine resolution to the matter. To do this, first reflect on the power you have in the situation and ask yourself what role you can play in turning this into a positive experience?
The next step is to indulge in a bit of self-evaluation and problem-solving. It’s easy to identify everything that is wrong in a situation. Take things one step further and evaluate the ‘why’ aspect of your thoughts. When you understand why things are wrong, then you can look for a solution.
Lastly, spend some time building a positive outlook. Seek every opportunity to identify what it is you are getting better at doing and identify how your developments contribute to personal growth in a good way. Remind yourself that perfection is not your end goal; self-improvement is a never-ending path.